There's no happy ending. Not even a happy beginning. This isn't the neighborhood Bangkok whore. This place is legit. " How reliable is Sam P.? To find out, definitively, whether or not In Thai Spa offers happy endings to its clientele, interim Editor-In-Chief Leah Beckmann (conveniently, a recent L. A. transplant) paid the parlor a a visit. "I said I was making an appointment for my boyfriend for his birthday, " Beckmann exclusively told She says she "asked for something special" for her boyfriend, but was told "they don't do that. " There you have it. Calvin Harris, who is in a warm and human relationship with Taylor Swift, probably just received a much-needed long, hard, legit massage. For two hours. [ Photo: Getty Images]
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I like Thai massages. It's like yoga without the work. All I wanted was someone to work out the kinks in my neck and rub my back and legs because I'm sore from deadlifting. I chose the place nearest to my house, 3 blocks away. I go in and pay up front like they ask. Ok, let's do it. She leaves the room and I get undressed. There's a sign on the wall that says "We are a legitimate massage service. We are not in the business of providing sexual services. No sexual services will be provided. Do not ask for or expect sexual services of any kind. " 4 lines. I guess they wanted to make it clear. I'd always heard stories of massage therapists' clients being pushy and creepy. They wanted to stave it off early. I felt at ease. I got naked and under the towel. She comes in and starts. She says "I'm going to give you a swedish/thai massage. " I say "Actually can I get the Traditional Thai Massage? I really like pressure. " Because I'm a bodybuilder. Was that the moment that set off what was to come?
Turn over? But… I'm naked… I turn over. Slowly. Sheepishly. I have a 3/4 boner going. I'm afraid to show it. I'm afraid she'll be put off by it. (I'm still in denial. ) Eventually I turn over and open my legs to her. She has a full view. What is she going to do? She puts the towel over my crotch. Thank heaven! Except. Wait a minute. It's not covering my testicles. The towel's over my penis, but my balls are feeling the open air! balls I'm rationalizing as hard as I can. "Just relax. " "No need to get excited. " "You're totally misreading the situation. " "Try to deflate your boner. " "They have a sign! " She starts working the front of my legs, all the way up to where the legs meet the pelvis, touching that "triangle patch" that is the pubis. And again, grazing my perineum. I think to myself, "I like that she's not letting the towel get in the way. I'm glad I'm not ashamed to 'accidentally' be exposed. " (keyword "accidentally") Also I might add, it felt fucking amazing. To have someone squeeze your leg from the top of your knee all the way to your pelvis was just great.
She'll rub massage oils all over the back of your body, ironing out any knots and strained joints. Once you've entered a state of relaxation, your masseuse will ask you to turn over, so she can give your front a little bit of loving. This is when the massage will take a happy turn. Your masseuse will begin to incorporate erotic massage styles, like sensually stroking up and down your body, and brushing her oiled naked form against yours. She'll alternate pressure to get you to a state of full arousal. You'll be brought to the edge of desire and taken back again, until you can take no more. The massage will be so teasing; you'll be driven mad with lust. Our masseuses are so skilled in this art that you'll be kept in this state for at least 30 minutes. When your therapist finally allows you to release your tensions, you'll be subjected to intense pleasure that crashes in overwhelming waves through your body. All that stress you've been carrying for weeks will come streaming out of you, literally and metaphorically, and you'll feel like a new man afterwards.
If you've spotted a slender, petite lady that you want to perform your massage, she'd probably be less capable of performing a proper traditional Thai massage due to the physical demands, and she might automatically defer to one of her larger, more experienced colleagues. In any case, I've found that the traditional massage can be quite painful if it is being delivered by someone who is not strictly a professional masseuse, so it might be an idea to avoid it altogether unless you are in a proper massage parlour. Meeting the sexiest Thai ladies for fun times is getting easier and easier to do via the online dating sites. A lot of girls like the extra discretion that is offered on: My recommended Thai dating site As alluded to above, a much better means of getting a Thai happy ending massage is to approach the girl that you like and ask her if she can do oil massages. The Thai oil massage is actually quite relaxing, and it is easy to perform since it doesn't require any great strength. The oil massage is also common knowledge that it is the most common prelude to a happy ending...
Only one of the big three review sites, RubMaps, had a listing for In Thai Spa, the $40-an-hour joint Harris was photographed happily walking out of. Six reviewers tested the waters there in 2013 and 2014, and the general consensus was this: The women working there give great massages, but they're not jerking anyone off. "I thought that Amy was attractive but knew that this Thai spot would be a risk, " writes one veteran RubMaps user, who's reviewed 31 massage parlors on the site: "I found her to be very pretty and attractive but Amy was one that was only a legitimate masseuse. She worked hard and looked good while doing it but she wasn't dressed in a whore type of way or anything like that which is what I wanted. Her massages were good and relieved my tension in the body. The conversations were pretty straight forward and she seemed to only do CMT [certified massage therapist] type techniques. It was hard not to get a HE [happy ending] From her especially since she was so cute but it was not offered so I had no choice but to take a great massage experience. "
See the soapy massage link below for a true story about what's on offer. I've already mentioned that the more specialized, dedicated happy ending massage parlours, offer the best services and for these you might need to know exactly where you are heading before setting off. The Thai soapy massage is the best of the adult massages and you'll need one of the big parlours to get it. The oil massage with happy ending is not a bad option to go with, but if you are looking for something special then you are well advised to go the extra mile and search out the Thai soapy massage; I've never heard a bad review of it from anyone in all the years I've been visiting Thailand! Thai Soapy Massage & Sex Without going into anything explicit, the Thai soapy massage is the choice of connoisseurs because of the beauty and skill of the massage girls that will perform it. You'll have a large selection of massage girls to choose from and, unlike what sometimes happens with the smaller massage shops, there is no doubt as to what you are there for.
Love that part of the massage. Even with that though, I wouldn't have minded if she played with my cock. Not that cute but it's dark enough in here where you wouldn't have to see her face. Told her next time I come in, to please and do the HJ. " Maybe next time! (Probably not. ) "The chicks are nasty, " our final monger summed up, "and you won't get the HE here. But this is just my review, I didn't even try to get the HE to be honest. She is friendly enough though that things may happen, but I just wasn't into her looks. " So, what are the chances Calvin Harris got his alleged genitals massaged at Hollywood's alleged "best happy ending" massage parlor? Not good. If Harris was on a mission for some sweet handie action, and assuming he's not a RubMaps-level connoisseur, he may have been misled by Yelp's search engine. In Thai Spa is indeed the top search result for "happy ending" in Hollywood, but it's also the top result for "massage, " which is what Yelp tries to suggest instead. Though one reason it ranks so high for "happy ending" seems to be this review by a Sam P. : "Get your mind out of the gutter.
Worth money!!! Date of visit: November 2018 Helpful? Reviewed 6 December 2018 via mobile Spectacular food and drinks programme, impeccable service and top of the line conversation. This place is a neon-lit haven in an otherwise overly-saturated town. Thanks again to Noomie and Nolan for making our night! Date of visit: November 2018 Helpful? View more reviews Silom Despite the lack of any major tourist attractions, this lively neighborhood is a favorite of many. Whether it's the (somewhat naughty) nightlife of Soi Patpong, the various handicraft night markets or the plethora of dining options that tickle your fancy, a night out in Silom is a must on every itinerary. It's worth a stop during daytime, too: join office workers on a quest to tasty street food during lunch and shop... More at Silom Complex for a great mix of Thai and international stores. After a day of strolling around the congested sidewalks, a visit to Silom's Lumphini Park, Bangkok's answer to NYC's Central Park, is a welcome change of scenery.